


L.O.V.E

by IndeliblyBoxedIn



Series: Jearmin Stuff [2]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Cuddling & Snuggling, Dancing, Falling In Love, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Jearmin - Freeform, Jearmin Week, Love, Love Confessions, M/M, Not really-just a scene, Nothing explicit, Rape/Non-con Elements, Song Lyrics, bad at tags, song-fic sort of
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-03
Updated: 2020-09-15
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:07:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 11,756
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21658021
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IndeliblyBoxedIn/pseuds/IndeliblyBoxedIn
Summary: Each short-ish chapter is based off of a line in the song L.O.V.E.All are focused on Jearmin, and their love story.Bad at summaries, it's a good time.May or may not be canon compliant.
Relationships: Armin Arlert & Jean Kirstein, Armin Arlert/Jean Kirstein
Series: Jearmin Stuff [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1561222
Comments: 3
Kudos: 19





	1. "L"

_“L” is for the way you look at me,_

Marco elbowed his best friend hard.

“Jean! You’re staring again!”

The brunette by his side started from his dreamy haze, blushing at the fact that he’d been caught gazing at the blonde two tables over in the hall, stuttering and blustering excuses as Marco spoke over him.

“If you like him so much, just go tell him!” The black haired teen rolled his eyes at his friend’s antics. “Come on!” Jean shook his head.

“No way, man. Jeager will kill me. Hell, Mikasa will kill me. And besides,” His eyes drifted once more to the blonde before focusing on fiddling with the straps on his legs, defeated. “He is way, _way_ , out of my league.”

Unbeknownst to the Trost native, from across the room, the object of his affection was stealing glances as well, and trying his best to ignore the twist of feelings in his stomach.


	2. "O"

_ “O” is for the only one I see, _

It was a rare night for the 104th Training Regimens (or what was left of it). Levi’s squad had been invited into the inner walls of Sina for a special gathering to honor the core members of the Survey Corps, possibly Historia’s doing, and would be arriving shortly after hours on horseback with a brief break to freshen up for the-

“Soiree.” Hanji had corrected eagerly to her short companion’s displeasure. 

“Tsk.” Levi hissed through his teeth. “Be on your best behavior brats. If it were up to me you’d be back, cleaning-”

“But he’s not!” Hanji exclaimed. “But please, no fires or explosions, no fights,” Levi looked pointedly at Jean and Eren who shrank slightly in their saddles from the corporal’s gaze.

“Keep everything strictly professional. Understood?”

\----

Any hope of professionalism was long gone.

From the moment of their arrival, the smartly dressed soldiers had been snapped up by the easily impressed bureaucracy. The masses fawned over the muscles of the young men, the beauty of the young women, and older men in particular seemed drawn towards Armin’s irresistable innocence. Wine flowed freely and soon the dancing had begun, with the sons and daughters of nobility unable to resist the charms and allure of the young soldiers in their midst.

Some had given in immediately, Eren, Connie, and Sasha had all accepted dances from multiple partners, laughing and joking the whole time as Armin declined his offers politely, and Mikasa kept her eyes on Eren. Surprisingly, Jean had also turned down many dances, preferring to keep an eye on the blonde angel instead (though he was still too cowardly to admit any type of feelings for the small bookworm). The night wore on as the party raged. Levi and Hanji had vanished, leaving the teens to their own devices, and showed no signs of reappearing when the host, some rich noble with an obvious wig, called out the final dance.

Buzzed, Jean slammed back another drink, praying for liquid courage to give him the strength to confess to a certain small soldier. “Fuck.” He shook his hair out of his face, seeing Connie and Sasha performing a spirited jig in the corner despite the slow music, Mikasa and Eren speaking in lowered tones nearby, other couples draped around the full room, some lone figures passed out around the room. So where was-

“Fuck!”

\-----

Armin squirmed feebly away from the fetid breath on his neck, alcohol turning his frantic movements into little more than passing thoughts. 

“No one’s coming for you.” a voice rasped in his ear. “You’re so cute, teasing me all night, come on.” The man squeezed his ass ignoring the staringled yelp from behind the forearm against the soldier’s throat. “You owe this to me, telling me no.” He leaned in for a kiss, moans turning quickly into a scream as Armin sank his teeth into the man’s tongue, refusing to let go until he tasted blood.

The would-be rapist lurched back, screaming and clutching at his mouth as Armin gasped in a breath only to spit out the foul blood, swiping his sleeve across his mouth and staring coldly at the assaulter, fear turned to anger. Blonde hair escaped from its tie drifted across the blonde’s vision, obscuring his normally expressive eyes.

“I don’t need anyone to come for me.” The words were punctuated with a kick that would have made Corporal Levi proud, laying the man out cold.

For a moment, the hall was silent, broken only by Armin’s heaving breaths as the adrenaline drained, leaving him horrified at his actions, when a noise came from behind.

Footsteps.

Armin whirled around, prepared to face a new tormenter when Jean came into view, stark relief fading into panic as he saw the blood smeared across paper-white skin.

“Armin! Oh Maria what happened, are you-?”

“It- it’s not mine.” Armin stuttered out as the brunette reached him. “I’m, alright.” Jean reached out hesitantly, as though wanting to be sure his friend was whole, and safe.

“Armin, what happened?” The blonde shook his head, hair now completely loose from it’s bind. “It’s not important.” he allowed the taller boy to gently wipe at the remaining blood with his sleeve, removing any traces of the encounter. Patient until the end, Armin waited for a moment before continuing. “Jean, what are you doing here, shouldn’t you be inside having fun? Dancing? I saw a lot of girls come up to you, unlike me, I never get asked-” Jean cut him off, practically yelling his answer in eagerness.

“I-I wanted to ask you to dance!”

Armin tripped over his feet, stumbling back a pace, wide blue eyes searching brown for any hint of a joke before dropping his gaze.

“That’s very mean, Jean. I didn’t think you were like that.”

Now it was Jean’s turn to be taken aback, stunned at the response.

“Armin, what-”

“Who put you up to it? Connie? Sasha? Eren?”

“No, Armin, I just-”

“Fine, make fun of me. I don’t care.” The blonde turned on his heel to stalk away.

“Wait!” Jean stood in the hall, arm outstretched.

“Why should I!” Armin spat back. “Give me one good reason.”

“Because I like you!” Armin’s shocked face made a reappearance, mouth slightly gaped. Jean swallowed hard, his secret and soul bared, and simply let the words tumble out. 

“Armin, I’ve wanted to tell you for a long time, since we were cadets actually, I just can’t stop watching you, oh no that sounds creepy but I’m not I swear, I just, you’re so, and I just, I like you.” Jean deflated, staring at his shoes. “I’ve been trying to ask you for andance all- oh forget it. Go on. I’m so sorry.”

A small noise caught the tall teen’s attention, jerking his head up to see Armin nearly bent double in giggles. As pleasant as the rarity was, Jean couldn’t help but feel a little insulted.

“What’s so funny? I’m trying to be honest with you-”

“No, no, Jean don’t take this the wrong way, but, it’s just, Maria help me, I’ve been such an idiot.” Armin raised his head, and Jean saw tear tracks among the laughter. “This while, time, I thought you, you like Mikasa. Or girls only, or, I don’t know. And then when I liked you, I thought, oh,” He shook his head wiping at his eyes. “Don’t you only like girls? You do know I’m a boy, right? What about all the different girls tonight?” Jean shook his head in turn.

“I thought I liked girls, but when it comes to you it’s just, something different. I know you’re a boy, and I’m a boy, but I can’t change how I feel. I tried, but, even with all the girls tonight, I turned them all down.”

Armin blinked again  _ (had his lashes always be that long?) _ before responding carefully, stepping closer, his question plaintive in the emptiness around them.

“Why?”

“Isn’t it obvious?”

Armin waited.

“I was, well, watching you. Waiting to see if I could finally talk to you without being an ass.” Jean met the other’s intense gaze. “But then I lost sight of you and, this...happened.” he gestured grandly, the small blonde taking a step closer.

“I came out here because I couldn’t bear to see you dance with anyone else.”

“Aren’t we a pair.”

The two were close enough to touch, the tension palpable in the late night air.

“Would,” Jean cleared his throat. “Would you like to dance?” He took a bow awkwardly even as Armin laughed, the sound pleasant and melodious.

“Jean there’s no music!” the strategist protested as he took the proffered hand that led him into the party room, where there was indeed, no music, the only sounds the gentle snores of those too drunk to move.

“So?” Jean began a gentle two step, arms open, his feet leading him in a gentle twirl over the tiled floor. “We’ll make it ourselves.” He stopped, inviting, waiting…

Armin stepped into his arms, smiling, as the two began a slow waltz to the music of the early morning doves as the sun began to rise in the distance.


	3. "V"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "V" is very, very, extra-ordinary.
> 
> Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These all end up way too long. Oh well.

_“V” is very, very, extra-ordinary,_

“Next!” Shadis’ voice cut through the blinding rain and rampant thunder, practically kicking the next cadet into the fray. “Arlert get a move on!” The rest of the 104th chuckled, breaking out in whispers.

Armin gulped audibly, gripping his gear tightly in sweat-slicked palms, and stepped off the platform, swinging towards the course ahead.

“You can do it, Armin!” Eren hollered from the end. “It’s easy!”

“Liar.” Ymir whispered. “It’s a fucking bloodbath.”

“Shut-up!” Jean elbowed the tall girl roughly. She responded by shoving him off the branch of the tree. Marco watched his friend knowingly, but couldn’t resist an eyeroll. Jean was so obvious it was a wonder no one else had figured it out.

The blonde swore quietly, and despite not hearing what Ymir had said, was in complete and total agreement.

The next fifty yards was a maze of ropes, trees, and platforms. Older members of the Training Corps littered the trees, armed with projectiles to dodge. Combined with the rain, the course was more than a test of skills, but an arduous gauntlet. Even Mikasa had had a few close calls, and Bertolt was nursing a bloody nose. 

Which meant Armin had no chance.

“Sometime before next year Arlert! What do you want, Braun to carry you?” The other cadets were straight-up laughing now. 

“Assholes.” Jean and Eren muttered from the other side, fixing one another with a surprised glare. Marco gave up on all subtlety and slapped the palm of his hand against his forehead. All other eyes rested on the airborne blonde.

“Half-way there!” Connie yelled.

“We can see that, Con.” Sasha said dryly.

 _I might actually get through this._ Armin thought optimistically. _Maybe-_

Time slowed. The small cadet locked eyes with a burly member of the 102nd in the tree to his right. A smirk on one face, and on the other, sudden, shocking, realization. The other cadet raised his hand, and all hell broke loose.

Armin didn’t see what was thrown, but he definitely felt it. 

There was a collective cringe from the masses, helpless to do anything but watch as the object slammed into Armin’s face, knocking him off course, and tangling one of his support lines around the wires that littered the area. Unable to halt his momentum, the unfortunate blonde smacked face first into a tree, and promptly plummeted to the forest floor.

“Oh sh-” Eren had no time to finish the sentiment before a figure swung past him.

\----------------------------

Armin lay on the ground, staring up at the falling drops, unmoving as they splattered his face with their chilly spray. _How beautiful,_ he thought. _I wonder if this is what it’s like to be a puddle._

He felt oddly tranquil, and somehow like he hadn’t just fallen from the height of a house. _It’s very peaceful down here._ Who cared about the wet? _Maybe I’ll just stay here…_

A figure swung in above him as a break came in the clouds, shining a ray of light down like a sign from above. Back and forth through the obstacles like they were nothing, weaving like a spider in a web, more graceful than any dancer he’d seen in the street, the other form came to a halt at his side, cape fluttering behind him like the heroes he had once read about with his grandfather. The figure bent over him, radiant in what nature had to offer, framed by light and by rain. 

_Wow._

Content to lie there, it took Armin a minute to realize the figure was speaking to him.

“-min. Armin! Armin, can you hear me?”

“What?”

A face swam into focus. 

“Jean?”

The brunette breathed a sigh of relief, as the blonde blinked up at him from the ground.

“Geez, Armin, you scared the hell out of everyone.” He slipped an arm beneath the smaller cadet’s shoulders, feeling his fingers slip through the blonde locks as he helped him sit up, Armin still blinking like a startled owl. Jean glanced where the other boy had hit and inwardly winced. “Armin, you left a dent in the ground, are you alright?” The small teen continued to stare at him, making Jean blush in the intensity of the azure eyes. “Come on,” Jean wrapped an arm around the slim shoulders and helped the blonde to his feet. He snuck another look at the boy and blushed a little redder. _Even covered in mud he’s adorable._ He didn’t have time to dwell on the thought before the rest of the squad surrounded them, Shadis pushing through.

“Kirschstein, is Arlert alive?” Jean straightened up. 

“Yes, sir. But I think he should be taken to medical.”

“Very well, get a move on.” The intimidating instructor turned sharply, booming to the masses. “What are the rest of you doing standing around?! What is this, a show?! Grab your gear and get moving!” The rest of the cadets quickly scattered, Eren pausing to give the Trost native the nastiest look he could before Mikasa tugged him away.

“Hey, Armin, are you good to move?” The blonde at his side nodded.

“I’m actually alright, just a bit dazed. I don’t think I’m hurt, I don’t _feel_ hurt.” That feeling lasted approximately five more seconds. The cadet went to take a step and nearly tumbled back into the mud.

“Shit!” Jean scooped up the smaller boy and headed back towards the barracks. “Come on.”

They were silent for a moment, something a little more than friendship developing, but unsaid.

“Jean?” Armin said softly, voice blending in with the raindrops.

“Mhm?”

“The way you used your ODM Gear today, it was, well, I think you were the best one out there.” Jean blinked, taken by surprise. “Uh, thanks.” Armin smiled, dazed, and leaned his head back, Jean keeping a close eye on the _(adorable)_ boy in his arms.

_I could get used to this…_

(And if no one had the heart to tell Armin that his knight in shining armor had made less of a sweeping entrance, and more of a crash-landing in the race to his side, well, Jean wasn’t complaining.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments fuel me.
> 
> Let me know how I'm doing.
> 
> I have finals I should be studying for, but I'm doing this instead.
> 
> Indelibly Yours,  
> -Boxed In


	4. "E"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "E" is even more than any one that you adore...
> 
> A moment out of context causes problems for the boys.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We've finally spelled out "LOVE", now for the rest...
> 
> I was considering splitting this chapter into two parts, but we'll have to see how long it turns out (this segment alone is 14.5 pages). When this started out it was just supposed to be quick drabbles, but, surprise! Each chapter is getting longer and longer.

_“E” is even more than any one that you adore,_

“Oh, Maria.” Armin breathed quietly, nearly choking on the words caught in his throat.

It was funny how your life could fall apart in a matter of moments.

\-----

Days off from training were a rarity. Once every few weeks the 104th was given the chance to truly experience their youth in a day without workouts, drills, or even chores. In this time, the young adults were free to do as they pleased.

For some that translated to lazing about the barracks, snoring the day away like Connie or Bertholdt. For others, like Mikasa or Annie, it was business as usual, though the two could usually be coerced away by their friends in the end before the two collapsed from another physical competition. Today the challenge was push-ups, and both girls were going strong into the afternoon. These match-ups were so dependable a few members of the 104th (and even the instructors) had taken to betting on the girls, and gathered around the dusty training field to make their wagers. Few teens chose to catch up on their studies, preferring to spend the warm days outside, playing games, chatting, or simply lying about. Sasha had elected to venture into the woods, declaring she would be back with something tasty for supper.

“Real meat!” She’d yelled, waving her weapon of choice. “You’ll see! And since it’s my catch, I’ll get first pick!”

“First pick?!” Jean hollered back, “You haven’t even caught anything yet! Heck, you haven’t even _left_ yet!” He tucked the small flower he’d been examining into his pocket and had returned to his sketch pad when a small pebble thwacked above his left ear. “Hey!” 

Ymir grinned wickedly before vanishing into the dense trees after Sasha with Historia in tow.

“Hay is for horses.” Eren snickered, diving away from any retribution the irate teen could return. He settled for kicking mud into the shallows.

“Fuck off Jeager.” The brunette grumbled. Eren cackled before launching himself towards the nearest cadet with a splash.

On this particularly hot day, the teens were granted their autonomy because the instructors had declared it, “Too fucking hot to move,” sending the majority of the adolescents tumbling and shouting towards the nearest lake. It could be more accurately classified as a large pond, but was sheltered on the shore by the overhanging trees, and had plenty of room for the members of the 104th in its depths and on the grassy banks. 

“Oh, come on you two.” Marco complained, treading water, “This is our first day off in a month, please don’t ruin it with petty bullshit.”

“Marco,” Reiner commented, “watch your goddamn language.” This set off a round of laughter, ended with Betholdt pouring a handful of water down Reiner’s back. “Hey! I’m just saying our last day off was family day, which sucked.” 

“Oh come on, it wasn’t that bad.” Franz yelled down from the tree, quickly turning his attention from the happenings on the ground to Hannah, busy carving their initials high up in the branches. “I thought it was nice.”

“It sucks if you don’t have a family jackass.” Eren retorted. There were a few winces as his statement hit home. Hannah turned to glare at her beau, along with the rest of the cadets at the lake. The tall boy blushed and dropped his head, not that the effect could be detected among the foliage.

“...sorry.” 

Bertholdt, thoroughly soaked from Reiner’s retaliation, flapped his hand at the response, waiving off the ill-thought comment. “D-don’t worry about it.” There were several murmurs of agreement.

“We won’t.” Hannah dropped by her knees to press an upside-down kiss to Franz’s blushed cheeks before pecking his lips.

“Get a room you two.” Jean snarked. “Go suck face somewhere else.”

“Like you and Thomas last week?” Hannah taunted.

“Sh-shut-up!”

“Or you and your mother?” Eren threw a lump of mud at the teen on the shore, avoided by the chestnut haired teen inching farther up the bank.

“Fuck you Jeager, leave my mother out of this.”

“Thomas and Jean-bo sittin’ in a tree. K-I-S-S-” 

“I fucking dare you to finish that Hannah.” The tan boy threatened.

“I can understand your mother, but why in the three walls were you making out with Thomas? I thought you and Armin were an item?” Mina asked. Jean flushed with embarrassment.

“We are, and I wasn’t making out with Thomas!” He turned to face Eren’s stony glare, putting his hand up in mock surrender. 

“Don’t let it slip to Amrin that he’s only your sidepiece, he’ll fucking flip.” Daz laughed, “Not that it wouldn’t be hilarious to watch.”

“Come on Jeager,” Jean pleaded, taking note of the slowly forming chaos, “I’d never cheat on Armin, Mikasa would kill me!” The glare deepened. “What? I wouldn’t! I’m not that big of an asshole.” He winced, “Ok, all of that came out wrong, but honestly, this whole thing was just a misunderstanding.” He stood up straight, “I really like Armin, and I’m not a cheater.”

“Really.” Reiner deadpanned.

“Yes!” Growing exasperated, Jean grit his teeth, “I can explain the whole thing with Thomas.”

Having heard his name several times now, the teen in question began to paddle over towards the disagreement.

“Then explain.” Eren stood from the water, crossing his arms and glaring at the Trost native. Jean took a glance around at the stares and rolled his eyes.

“Not that it’s any of your business, especially the business of busybodies.” Hannah flipped her hair nonchalantly. “But, in my family, it's a tradition that any time you say hello or goodbye to someone close to you, or you’re really grateful for something that someone did, like, really helping you out, you kiss them once on each cheek. My mother said it has something to do with the french in us,” He frowned, “whatever that is. It’s just a habit now, honestly.”

“And just how was Thomas _helping_ you?” Daz yelled, “Other than, you know, a helping hand-y?” He made an obscene gesture in front of his crotch, earning several jeers and jokes from the audience.

“No!” Jean argued, face now beet red. “It was, I just,”

Thomas climbed out of the lake on the other side. “He broke the strap on his gear, again,” he said dryly, “I had an extra.”

“Shadis would have murdered me.” Jean put in unhelpfully to the sound of several chatters of agreement.

“It was three minutes to report time,” Thomas continued, ignoring the crowd, “and he wouldn’t have had time to take all the straps off and fix it, so I did it for him.” He shuffled a little under the intense, judgmental gazes of the other cadets.

“I was just really thankful, ok?” added the brunette. “It was a reflex.”

“And not that any of you care, but yes, it was really awkward, and so is this.” Thomas sheepishly returned to the cool escape the water offered.

There was a deafening silence, followed by a loud splash as Marco heaved a rock into the center of the pond.

“What the shit, Bott!” Eren yelled, followed by several other similar outbursts.

“Oh shut the _fuck_ up, Eren!” The freckled boy yelled back, “and Reiner, if you tell me to watch my language I will make your nightmares come true.” The outburst sent the angsty teens into a shocked silence. Marco looked around in exasperation.

“Don’t act so surprised. I am tired of being your voice of reason, it’s been what, three, four times now? Geez, it’s like I’m the only person with common sense.”

“What?”

“Nothing. Now, you all have two choices. One: shut up, settle down, and stop being such dicks, or keep up the bullshit until Shadis hears and drags us all back!”

There was complete and utter silence, the group looking at their companion, horrified. Mina snorted and began laughing, quickly joined by the rest of the training corps. Marco climbed down and held up a hand to Jean’s smirking face, “Don’t. Say. Anything.” 

The chestnut haired boy chuckled lowly and ruffled his best friend’s damp locks. “Where would I be without you?” 

Marco brushed off the hand, “Probably dead in a ditch.” The two shared a laugh turned shoving competition, Jean successfully tossing his friend back into the water, laughing hysterically. It was going to be a good day.

The sun continued its slow climb, promising a scorching afternoon as the 104th continued their antics. While most of the cadets could be lumped into one group or another, the majority opting to strip down and join the others in the lake, there was one member of the Training Regimens doing something very different with his day.

\-----

At the first mention of a day off, Armin had risen, dressed, left a note in his place, and vanished out into the fields. The mornings had yet to grow unbearable in their heat, and he planned to take full advantage of it. In his bag he carried his notebook, pencil, and a large book on botany he had borrowed from the shelves of the barracks. By sunrise he had trekked out into the marshy wetland, and began his search.

For hours he looked fruitlessly for useful herbs the book had promised grew in areas similar to his current environment, growing increasingly damp and dirty.

Hours passed, the sun climbing high above the lone figure digging through the dirt. By mid-morning he had found a few common field-flowers and a patch of yarrow, but nothing like what the book had promised. Discouraged, nursing a bee sting, and rapidly growing tired, he finally gave into the insistence of the star above him, gathering his discarded jacket and shoving it into his satchel, and heading into the trees towards the sounds of laughter.

\-----

“Ugh.” Jean scowled at his drawing for the umpteenth time, scrubbing out a line with his now-dirty sleeve. Noticing his friend’s distress, Marco excused himself from his conversation with Tom and Gordon, shaking his head quickly to fling off any errant droplets before heading over to the brunette’s claimed area under a sloped willow. It took several moments for Jean to notice him, ebony hair of his friend blending into the shadows.

“Hey, down there.”

“Hey.” Jean grumped, moving slightly aside so his freckled companion could join him, “I thought you were done being my voice of reason.” 

Marco jabbed a finger in the lanky brunette’s side, “You’re such an asshole! How do you even have a boyfriend?” 

Jean shrugged, grumbled, “I don’t know.” and resumed focus on his drawing again, face resting in his annoyed expression.

“Why are you being so disgruntled on this rather gruntling day?” Marco groaned.

“Gruntling?” Jean finally lifted his gaze, a slow grin spreading across his face.

“It’s a word!” Marco defended.

“It is, but it doesn’t mean what you think it does.” Jean snickered. “It’s a word for a small pig. Like Jeager.” 

Marco couldn’t help but laugh at the other teen’s antics, both ignorant to a pair of sharp ears picking up on their conversation, “And just how do you know that?” 

Jean raised an eyebrow. 

Marco sighed, “I get it. No need to brag about how you’re seeing the smartest boy in the camp.”

“Seeing him is the problem.” Jean groused.

Pale brown eyes blinked several times, “Are you guys having,” Marco dropped his voice to a whisper, “relationship problems?”

“What?” Jean looked confused, “No! No, nothing like that.” Long fingers withdrew a note from his pocket, unfolding it and reading aloud.

_Dear Jean (doesn’t that sound ridiculous?),_

_Heading to the field today._

_Plants._

_Have fun at the lake._

_Don’t get into a fight._

_Love,_

_Armin_

“It’s like he can read my mind. He even left me this-” He held up the paper and charcoal, “He knows me so well he can predict what I want to do most! I want to do something for him, but...just look at this!” He tossed the sketch pad forcefully at his friend, dropping his head into his hands. On it was a beautifully drawn blonde figure sitting near the water, examining the small warm-colored flowers that grew around the pair in the real-world. Drawn Armin looked excited and pleased, a rare smile gracing his penciled lips. His black and white eyes mirrored their blue counterparts perfectly, Jean doing their world more than justice on his page.

“Wow.” Marco said softly, his mouth forming a small ‘o’ of surprise. “Jean, that’s incredible. I know you probably see fifteen things wrong with it, but really, it’s-” A funny look came over him, twisting his features, “Can you draw me one of Mina?” Jean shoved his friend. “Maybe. You creep. Anyway,” He swiped at his forehead, “Something is wrong with his hair, and I can’t figure it out.” Marco patted his shoulder.

“Trust me, leave it as is, he’ll love it.” He was about to excuse himself back to the lake when another voice intruded on their conversation.

“I think it sucks, Horse-face.” Jean quickly placed his drawing aside and stood, brushing off the dirt from his pants.

“I don’t remember asking _you_ Jeager.” Jean replied quickly. “Mind your own business.” 

Eren stepped forward, challenging. “You made it my business when you called me a pig, horse-boy.” 

Jean shrugged. “Hey, bastard,” Eren bristled at the words. “Don’t get mad at me for telling the tru-” He was tackled mid-sentence by an extremely irate teen. Marco sighed and turned to jump in the water, pointedly ignoring the scuffling pair. The bout lasted all of five minutes when a stray kick sent the abandoned sketch pad tumbling towards the water below.

“Fuck!” Jean leapt out of the battle and lunged for the precious paper, arm outstretched towards the watery grave. This was it, he could never reach it in time-

A freckled hand appeared, snatching up the pad before it met its demise, returning the object with only the corner damp to it’s shocked and ruffled owner. Off to the side, the bushes began to part as a figure fought their way through to the grove, a secondary factor in the chaos.

“Honestly.” Marco snarked, tossing his head to the side dramatically. “You’d be utterly lost without me to take care of yo-mmph!” The sketch now safely in the artist’s possession, Jean had placed the item at the roots of his tree before planting a kiss on Marco’s mouth. The two froze for a moment in shock before jerking back, rubbing at their mouths.

“What the hell, Jean!’ Marco admonished.

“It was supposed to be a ‘thank you’ kiss! I was really grateful!”

“On the mouth?!”

“I was aiming for your cheek! I told you my mother used to do it all the time! Just ask Thomas!”  
“Yeah, ask his side piece!” Franz called from the tree.

“Shut-up, lover boy!”

“You’re one to talk!”

Eren looked up from where he was washing his face by the shore, “That’s gay, Kirschstein.”

“ _I’m_ gay, _Jaeger,_ and don’t think we haven’t noticed your staring at Corporal Levi when you think he doesn’t see you.” Eren didn’t respond, but his ears flushed red at the accusation. The conversation died, and once more the teens parted to their own devices.

There were several minutes of amicable calm before a figure appeared from the distance, pushing through the thick undergrowth towards the group, scarily silent and driven.

“-I don’t know.” Jean was remarking, staring at the sketch. “I think it’s missing something?” The figure pounced. Mikasa knocked the papers aside and seized the taller teen by his collar, somehow managing to lift him to his toes.

“Mikasa, what the f-”

“Shut up.” She said softly, but no less menacingly. “Then take a good moment to think, and shut up again.” Her fist tightened at her side, but remained still, an exercise in restraint.

“Tell me.” Jean strained to hear her, “What makes you think it’s ok to hurt my brother?”

“What?” Jean looked shocked in the face of danger. “I haven’t done shit to Eren today!”

“You got in a fight with him.” One of the other cadets muttered. Jean shot them as dirty a look as he could manage while being nearly suspended by a girl two inches shorter than him. The dark eyes narrowed, sending Jean backtracking anxiously.

“I meant, I haven’t done anything out of the ordinary! Look, he’s right there, he’s fine!” Eren did an awkward half-wave from the water, frozen in place with the rest of the 104th.

“Not Eren.”

There was an audible gasp from the spectators. Eren whirled around, already annoyed, “Oh shut the fuck up!”

“Then who-” The confusion showed in Jean’s expression, resolving into distress. “Armin?” He began to struggle. “Where is he? Is he hurt? What happened?”

Mikasa dropped the slightly taller cadet, allowing him to regain his footing. “Why don’t you tell us?” Her words were enough of an opportunity for Eren to slosh to shore.

“I told you I would end you if you hurt him Kirstein!” 

Jean was angry now, fists clenched at his sides, “If you’d listen to me for three seconds you’d know I didn’t do anything! I would never-”

“Really? Then why did Armin come to me in tears?”

\------

It was only a few hours past sunrise, and already the earth was scorched, down to where the drops of sweat from the competing cadets soaked into the cracked soil. The conditions were such that even the eager gamblers had retired to the cooler underground and trees, leaving Annie and Mikasa to sweat out their battle in the grueling environment.

_‘Fuck it’s hot.’_

_‘I don’t even know what number we’re on.’_

_‘I can keep going as long as she can.’_

And so the competition raged on. Until…

Mikasa lifted her head to the sound of hysterical sobbing growing closer.

 _‘It can’t be.’_ Concerned, she jumped to her feet and headed towards the source. Luckily, it wasn’t hard to find.

“Armin!?” The blonde stumbled out from the overgrowth, hair full of twigs, face and arms scratched to hell, tears streaming from cerulean eyes, bag and jacket dropped carelessly into the dirt beside him. Without a second thought Mikasa reached out to the small teen to hug him, allowing him to sob into her shoulder. Annie came crashing through the brush a moment later.

“What the hell, Ackerman? It’s not fun to crush you if you give...up.” she caught sight of the pair and froze, “Ok, what’s his deal?” Mikasa shot her rival a look to which Annie rolled her eyes and waited impatiently.

“Armin,” Mikasa asked, gently grasping the narrow shoulders, leaning him back to look him over, wiping a teardrop before it could work its way into one of the many stinging scrapes. “What happened? Is everyone ok? Is it Eren?” Armin hiccuped, shaking his head, sniffling, his nose brighter red than usual.

“It’s, it’s, it’s,” he stammered through sobs. “It’s Jean. He-”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cliffhanger! (Not really, the next chapter should be up in a few minutes.) Had to chop this, it was just REALLY long and I know getting through long chapters in a sitting can be difficult.
> 
> Sorry for grammatical errors, I'm working on that (no beta, just me!)
> 
> Sorry for the lateness, finals happened (3 As and 2 Bs if anyone cared), but hopefully I'll be updating more with more time on my hands.
> 
> As always, I love feedback, so if you like it, or have anything you'd like to see from me, just let me know!  
> Comments are my addiction.
> 
> Indelibly yours,
> 
> -Boxed In
> 
> PS: If you like Jearmin (and a bit of gratuitous HurtArmin), keep your eyes peeled for a new work, coming soon!


	5. "E"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part 2 of Chapter 4! Enjoy...
> 
> Edit: Sorry for the mix-up with the chapter order! I'm just a sleepy dumb***

_“Armin,” Mikasa asked, gently grasping the narrow shoulders, leaning him back to look him over, wiping a teardrop before it could work its way into one of the many stinging scrapes. “What happened? Is everyone ok? Is it Eren?” Armin hiccuped, shaking his head, sniffling, his nose brighter red than usual._

_“It’s, it’s, it’s,” he stammered through sobs. “It’s Jean. He-”_

\----

Looking forward to the cool water, the petite teen trudged down the track wearily, sweat soaking his bangs and trailing down his spine uncomfortably. At least something could save the disappointing day, maybe Jean had drawn something nice.

Alone in the woods, Armin flushed just thinking about his boyfriend, handsome and so beyond his reach, and then mentally berated himself for being able to be embarrassed with no one else around. The chastisement didn’t manage to redirect all of his thoughts, still caught wondering how Jean could possibly want a burden like him when he could have any girl, or boy, in the 104th (with the notable exceptions of Eren and Mikasa). Any member of their training corps could easily outperform the small bookworm in looks, strength, agility. It must be out of pity that Jean would even want to associate-

Armin shook his head, hoping the movement would dispel those thoughts as he continued towards the lake, able now to hear the distant splashes and shouts. Seeing the path to the shore, he veered around to the opposite bank, knowing that just beyond the treeline was the willow where Jean liked to sit and sketch, face scrunched in concentration as he captured details with his charcol, better than any portrait Armin had seen. He felt his heart give another involuntary flutter as he pushed aside several waving vines, avoiding several shrubs and creepers, momentarily focused on untangling his short-pants from a pricker bush on his quest to surprise his partner. He took a moment beyond the lichen to straighten his hair and clothing in an attempt to make himself a little bit more presentable, and a little less like he had been crawling around in the dirt for a few hours. Letting a slow smile grace his features, he pushed aside the greenery and poked his head through, a greeting on his lips.

What he saw froze him in his tracks.

Jean.

Kissing Marco.

On the lips.

While everyone else watched.

He jerked back, clapping a hand over his mouth to prevent a sob from escaping.

He was right, why did he have to be right? Armin took another shaky step backwards, away from the scene as the horror of the situation came rushing at him. The blonde turned and rushed back towards the barracks, disregarding the branches that tore at his face and clothing, blinded by tears.

How could he have been so stupid? Not just stupid, delusional. He should have known. He should have had the common sense to see past his childish crush that Jean was just jerking him around, toying with him, making fun of him all along. How many had been laughing at him behind his back all this time? How long had Marco been the real target of Jean;s affection? Had he been in on it too? Armin had seen how close Jean and Marco were, and he should have known that he could never hope to compare to the raven haired teen. Marco was beautiful and strong where he was pathetic and weak. Of course he was the better match for Jean…

Armin broke down, pausing to sob helplessly into the dirt, uncaring of his appearance anymore, disregarding the punishing heat. His heart was broken, and nothing could fix it.

Feeling incredibly alone and insignificant, he cried.

Maybe he should have known, but that didn’t make it hurt any less.

\-----

“I left Armin with Annie, and I came to get some justice. What physical pain is most proportional to a broken heart?” She took a threatening step towards the confrontational teen, only to have him turn-tail, snatch the drawing pad, and sprint back up the path, leaving the surprised asian staring at his dust trail.

“Sorry Mikasa, I have to make this right! Marco, explain for me!”

The freckled boy sighed, glancing nervously at Mikasa as one would a snarling dog, swallowing hard as he became the sole focus of her ire.

 _God-fucking-damn-it, Jean._ He cursed in his head. _You owe me BIG time._

He looked briefly to the unusually silent Eren in the water, pleading with his eyes for his help. The brunette boy shook his head emphatically. Marco sighed again, and gave the world’s weakest grin. “So, it’s really a funny story…”

\-------

“Armin!” Jean yelled, sprinting up the dusty road towards the training grounds and quarters. He paused in the deserted yard, coughing into the dry dirt, the mid-afternoon heat more than oppressive. “Armin!”

“Looking for someone?” Annie’s drawl startled him, looking up to where the tall blonde sat on the edge of the roof, picking dirt from under her nails with a rather conspicuous knife. 

“Annie,” Jean panted, relieved, “Have you seen-”

“Shut-up.” The girl said dryly.

“I really wish people would stop saying that to me,” Jean grumbled. Annie jumped down from her perch, still running her fingers over the slim weapon.

“Well,” her monotone never wavered. “Normally I don’t give a shit about what you all do, but whoever makes Armin cry like that must be heartless, and that’s coming from me.” Jean blinked for a minute, solidly confused.

“But, I’ve seen _you_ make Armin cry,”

“Yeah. My point.” She whipped her knife up to the brunette’s throat, smirking at his almost-crossed-eyes. To his credit, he didn’t flinch, still focused on the task at hand. “So, you wouldn’t happen to know why our favorite bunny rabbit was crying his damn eyes out, would you?”  
“Annie,” Jean cried, exasperated. “Please, I don’t have time for this. I need to see Armin. I, I need to explain.”

“Explain what?” Jean turned so quickly it nearly gave him whiplash. Armin stalked out from the shadows of the building. It was apparent that he had been crying, yet his eyes held no tears, now. His face and arms bore a myriad of small cuts and scrapes, though someone had taken the time to bandage the worst of them. “I saw you kissing Marco, Jean.”

The older boy opened his mouth to respond when he felt a faint prick at his adam’s apple, reminding him of Annie’s (and more importantly, the _knife’s_ ) presence. 

“It’s ok, thank you, Annie.” Armin said quietly, allowing the tall girl to slip away into the afternoon. He took another pace forward, footsteps barely disturbing the earth where he walked. Jean felt the breath leave his lungs.

Even with face red and blotchy from crying, tear tracks clear still on his face, body small and scratched, blue eyes filled with anger, pain, despair, _betrayal_ … To him, Armin was an angel, and it still gave him butterflies every time they met, even if it was for a situation like _this…_

“Armin,” He went to take a step forward, towards his (ex?)boyfriend, but those eyes, those _eyes_ , colored like the ocean Armin loved to talk about, held him fast to where he was. “Armin I,” he ran a hand through his hair, “It’s so messed up.”

“You wanted to explain.” Armin crossed his arms, looking incredibly uncomfortable. “So explain.”

Jean lowered his hands, speaking honestly.

“Yes, I kissed Marco, but it didn’t mean anything-”

“Stop.” The ice in the normally warm tone could have chilled the day. “Please stop pretending that there’s nothing wrong.”

“Armin, it didn’t mean anything-”

“Don’t lie to me!” The blonde clapped his hands over his mouth, as though he could take back the scream. “Jean, please, don’t lie to me.” The tears began streaming down his face, wet anger taking over.

“You think that I don’t know that I never had a chance with you?! I didn’t want to think about it because I knew what you realizing that meant.” He heaved in a stuttering breath, tears already forming. “It meant something horrible, and awful, and cruel, because it means that all along you were just making fun of me behind my back!” he broke off, trying to muffle his distress. Jean felt his heart wrench in his chest, threatening to tear itself in two as Armin continued his hysterical rant. “For a moment, I really thought that you liked me, and now it’s, I feel so used!” Shouting now, loudly enough the entire camp must hear them. “Was that your goal? Make fun of the worst member of the training corps? I bet you and everyone else had a great laugh! You got what you wanted! I feel humiliated, and demeaned, and I should have known better because Marco has _everything_ , and I’m _nothing._ ” Unable to take it anymore, the small blonde burst into tears of sheer anger, and Jean could do nothing but watch. Armin sniffed and dropped his head to his chest, the next words dampened by his shirt, spoken thickly through tears. “Just, tell me why, and then leave me alone.” He lifted his head, amber meeting sapphire. “Please.”

Jean’s head swam. How did this get to this point, on the precipice of losing the love of his life, all over a dumb tradition starting an even dumber rumor?

“Armin,” No matter what, he was going to plead his case, and pray that his partner understood, “This is going to sound crazy, but I’m going to try to explain everything.” He took a deep breath, suddenly aware of the sketch pad in his hand. “Do you remember when my mother visited.” Armin gave him a look that clearly suggested that the brunette had lost his mind, but answered regardless. “...yes.”

_Family days were usually hell for all those in the training corps without relations, but somehow, meeting Jean’s warm, friendly, yet slightly intimidating, mother made it a little better._

_Jean had introduced the small blonde to the large brunette woman (who both did, and did not look like her son), who immediately doted on him with all the protectiveness of a mother bear and a new cub. She professed how cute he was, how skinny he was, and how lucky her Jeanbo was to have him. The entire meeting left Armin, who hadn’t had a mother since he was an infant, raised primarily by his grandfather, in a bit of a daze, and over emotional. Her departure had actually brought him to tears._

“Well, do you remember when she left?”

Armin thought back. 

_Ms. Kirstein had bent down to press two swift kisses to each of Armin's cheeks, laughing as the boy blushed bashfully._

He nodded.

Jean sighed in relief. “You remember how she said goodbye to us? And how I did the same to her?”

_It was true, Jean had pressed similar kisses to his mother’s face, having to bend slightly to reach her tearful face, overwhelmed by how much her baby had grown into a soldier._

“...I, yes. I do.” 

Jean couldn’t get the next words out quickly enough. “Remember how we explained why we do that?”

“Tradition. Or, habit.”

Jean nodded eagerly. “It’s just a tradition for saying goodbye, or thank you. Earlier you just saw me-”

“Thanking, Marco?” Jean was taken aback by Armin’s mocking tone. “On the lips. Nice try.” His tone was cold and callous.

“No, Armin, please understand.” Jean said, growing flustered. “That part was an accident, really.” Armin glared at him, incredulous, but to his credit, continued to listen. “I had been working all day on a, well, a gift for you, and then I got in a fight with Eren,” Armin tsked disapprovingly. “And in the confusion it, the gift, almost fell in the water. Marco managed to save it, and I was just so thankful I just acted out of muscle memory, I guess. I didn’t want to disappoint you, and have all of this be ruined when I worked so hard.”

“What did you draw, a letter of resignation?” Armin asked dryly. “You know, liar isn’t a good look for you, Jean. You could have at least tried to make it believable.” He turned to leave.

“Wait!” The taller boy was desperate, restraining himself from reaching out and grabbing the retreating form by the wrist.

“Why should I?!” Armin yelled back. “Go be with your new boyfriend, I’m sure Marco’s waiting.” He walked a few more paces away. “Don’t make this harder than it already is.”

“I don’t want Marco.” Jean pleaded. “I just want you.” he was close to tears, despairing in his inability to clear up such a stupid misunderstanding. 

“Well you should have thought of that before you decided to cheat and lie about it.” Armin readied himself to leave again. “I’ll move my things back to my bunk. It’s better this way.” Another glance. “Goodbye, Jean.”

Both teens were exasperated, hurt, upset, and it seemed that nothing could fix the mess. 

“I can’t lose you!” Jean burst out. “Not like this, please, Armin. How can I-” He looked down at the sketch pad still clenched in his hand. “Prove it.”

“Armin!”

“What?!” The blonde threw up his arms in exasperation. “What more could you possibly want from me?”

Finally able to move, Jean stumbled his way to the blonde’s side. “Look!”

Armin’s eyes widened as he took in the drawing, the still-damp corner, the dirt coating the top page. Took in Jean, clothes rumpled, eyes wide and glistening, and back to the paper, to the words scrawled in the corner.

“For Armin,” he read aloud, eyes widening, “A sign of my blooming love…” He trailed off, raising his eyes to look at the taller boy, eyes filling with tears. “Jean…” The aforementioned teen panicked.

“Do you hate it? Is it-” he was silenced by a small kiss on his lips. He closed his eyes, allowing himself to melt into the familiar affection for a moment before pulling back. “What was that for?” Armin allowed himself a small smile.

“For you. It’s perfect.” He sniffed, wiping at his eyes, “You know how cheesy that is, right?” 

Jean rolled his eyes, dropping the sketch in order to sweep his small boyfriend off his feet (literally). Armin gasped, eyes following the object’s descent into the dirt. “Jean, your hard work-” he laughed as Jean kissed him again. “Jean?!”

“Why would I need a drawing when the real thing is so much better?”

“Jean...” The small blonde allowed himself to be lost in the moment, before he jerked back, nearly sending himself down to the ground.

“Whoa, hold on.” The tall boy lowered petite feet to the ground, steadying them both. “Armin, what’s the matter?”

Armin dropped his head, his cheeks flushed red.

“You must think I’m horrible.”

“What?” Jean let his confusion show. “Why would I think that?”

“Anyone would,” Armin muttered guiltily, before snapping his head up, nearly colliding with Jean’s nose. “Oh, Maria, I am so screwed.”

“Armin,” Jean placed his hands on the blonde’s shoulders, hoping to alleviate some of the anxiety. “Talk to me, why would I-”

“Everyone must think I’m so stupid!” Armin burst out, reaching his hands up to run through the thin strands of his hair. “Jumping to conclusions like I did, causing a big scene, and then crying like a baby over nothing. Then not believing you, I called you a liar!” Armin pulled back. “Jean, I’m so sorry for all of this, I should have known you’d never, I should have just, I overreacted, I’m so embarrassed, how could you possibly forgive me?”

“Armin.” Jean smiled gently at his nervous partner. “It’s ok.”

“No it’s not!”

“Armin, come on.” Jean pushed errant strands away from the cherubic face. “Listen, just for a few more moments?” He pulled the petite boy close. “No one thinks any less of you, including me. I don’t blame you for the way you thought, I mean, the whole story is ridiculous, and it really looked like I planted one on Marco, though, no offense to him, I’d rather kiss a titan.” He shuddered lightly. “Honestly, it was like kissing a brother. Completely weird. I’d much rather kiss my handsome boyfriend.” Armin cracked a small smile.

“I’m not handsome.” Armin protested, “But thank you.”

“Fine then, adorable.” He peppered the blonde head with kisses. “And no one is going to think anything bad about you. Everyone- well, almost everyone, loves you, no matter what. And yes, that includes me.” He wrapped the small frame in an embrace, tucking a golden head against his collar-bone. “And if they do, who cares what they think? To me, you’re perfect,” Armin shook his head, modest to a fault. Jean dipped a hand under his chin, tipping the smaller head up to lock eyes, “Hey, none of that. No deflecting, no self-deprecation, you are the most beautiful, the most perfect, most intelligent, most astonishing person, and nothing you do or say, could or would make me leave you, do you understand?” Jean pulled his boyfriend close again, allowing a small tear to escape.

“Jean?” Armin looked up, surprised to see his boyfriend crying, “Is everything alright?” Jean let out a laugh, allowing the other boy to reach up and wipe away the pearlescent drops.

“Everything is great, Armin,” He took a breath and looked deep into the blonde’s eyes, allowing himself to be lost in the shining pools. “Armin, you’re everything to me,” He reached down, grasping for the cool hand, twining pale fingers with his. “You feel, and you understand me more than any other person ever has, sometimes, I think you know me better than I know myself. You are the most important, precious, wonderful person in my life, and I only wish you could see yourself how I see you. I adore you Armin,” he took in a sharp breath, “And I love you.”

Armin let out a small gasp at the spontaneous declaration. “Jean,”

“You don’t have to say it back right away!” Jean blustered. “And that’s ok, but I had to-”

“I love you too.” Armin said softly, standing on tiptoe to press another kiss to the increasingly familiar lips. This time, the couple let it last a little longer than strictly necessary, allowing the tension to leave them, replacing the angst, fear, and heartache with their simple reminder of love.

“I’m sorry today has been such a shitshow.” Jean said as soon as they parted. “I honestly didn’t expect something like this to happen...ever?” 

The two shared a laugh as Jean fished in his pocket, pulling out a small white flower.

“So much for a restful day off.” Armin giggled. Jean presented the flora to the blonde before tucking it carefully behind one of the elfin-like ears.

“At least we got something out of- hey!” Armin had snatched off the flower, leaving Jean stunned.

“You could have just said you didn’t like it!”  
Armin waved him off. “Where did you get this?”

Jean raised an eyebrow, skeptical, but helpful. He shrugged. “Down by the lake. The entire area is littered with them, see?” He retrieved his drawing from where it lay, forgotten. Armin’s eyes widened.

“Please, take me there!”

“Your wish is my command.” Jean declared, gathering the other cadet into his arms and setting off towards the water, pausing momentarily to collect Armin’s abandoned belongings. “That’s what they said in one of the stories from those books you used to read us, right?” 

Armin laughed, a real, happy laugh. Jean grinned, jostling the slight figure just to hear that sound again.

\------

The others at the lake noted their arrival before returning to their shenanigans. The day was only half-over after all.

“Guess those two made up.” Connie remarked off-handedly, turning his knife carefully over the carving in his palm. “Did you see, Eren?”

“Yeah, yeah.” The teen looked nonchalant, but kept a careful eye on his best-friend and rival as Jean softly placed Armin down near a few patches of flowers, the blonde excitedly talking and gesticulating, dropping his knees to get a closer look while the taller boy stood nearby, looking adoringly at the small teen, a dopey smile cementing him as completely love-stuck.

“As long as Armin’s happy, it’s whatever.” 

“That’s nice.” Hannah commented from the shore. Eren shrugged, choosing to mumble the second half of his declaration.

“Even though horse-face is a man-whore.”

“Eren?” Mina hollered from across the pond. 

The teen in question jumped guiltily at the prospect of being caught. “Wha-, yeah?” 

“Shut up!” 

Eren fumed. “Why?!” 

The small girl shrugged. “It seemed like it had been a while since someone said it, so I thought I would.” Cackling, she shared a crisp high-five with Marco, leaving Eren to stew in the water.

\-----

The rest of the day passed without incident.

From high in the trees, two girls watched the hours pass. Armin chattered happily to Jean about the many uses of the Broadleaf Arrowhead (“duck potato!”), the latter content to watch and listen, stealing the occasional kiss. Sasha returned with her entourage, and surprisingly 12 rabbits, Ymir telling any interested party about how Historia had discovered a burrow. Reiner and Eren dragged rocks over to make a fire in the rapidly cooling evening, promptly got into a fight about how to best start it, and were so invested they didn't notice Bertholt resigning to lighting the tinder and quickly fleeing the scene, making for two very confused (and embarrassed) alpha males. Slowly, the 104th regrouped around the fire, filling the summer evening with laughter, jeers, and a general sense of ease and content.

“Looks like we didn’t need to murder anyone after all.” Mikasa remarked, passing the blonde back her knife. Annie huffed, sheathing it at her ankle.

“Shame. Armin’s too cute for his own good.”

“So are you.” The raven girl muttered under her breath.

“What was that?”

“Nothing.”

The two sat in amicable silence for a few minutes, watching as Jean passed Armin his jacket, Sasha and Connie got into a card game that seemed to involve shouting and slapping as part of the rules, and Mina coversing quietly with Hannah in the shadow, both sending glances that two particular male cadets across the way.

“We never finished our competition today.”

“Nope.”

“Rematch?”

“In your dreams.”

“And your nightmares.”

“Yeah...Wait, what?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading.
> 
> Motivation and all that.
> 
> Please comment or whatever.
> 
> Thanks!
> 
> IY,  
> -BI


	6. "Love is..."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Love is all that I can give to you.
> 
> Happy Yule.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the hiatus.

_ Love is all that I can give to you _

“What a shitty Yuletide.” Jean grumbled. 

He wasn’t wrong.

The world outside the cracked window was blanketed in white, snow falling thickly amongst the strong gusts of wind, rendering the night frozen in silence. Visibility was slim, as was any chance at surviving in the weather. Temperatures had to be at a record low, and cloaks of any thickness would only prolong suffering.

The fugitives of Levi Squad had been forced to shelter in an abandoned house well outside the protection of the walls, a small fire standing between them and certain hypothermia. Unwilling to stray far from their heat source, the members had set up camp in the kitchen, as close to the stove as humanly possible. Levi had spurned the idea of a night watch, questioning the sanity of the teens.

_ “In this fucking weather? Are you stupid?” _

Sasha’s soup soon ran out, and with wood running low, the teens elected to turn in, beginning to pitch their tents in the cramped quarters, just to avoid the bone-chilling drafts. Their captain had watched the scurrying teens bicker for a moment before he couldn’t take it anymore, sighing and slapping a hand over his eyes.

_ “If you’d use your brains for more than something to fill your thick skulls, you’d realize there’s not enough room in this shithole for all of you to pitch your tents, not to mention if you sleep alone you’ll freeze to death before morning. Double up, and shut up.”  _ With that the disgruntled officer had slipped into his own impeccable fabric structure, snapping at the science officer to,  _ “Put that shit away before you blow us to hell!”  _ Followed by the sounds of a squabble, poorly muffled. The remainder of the Special Operations squad lingered for a moment before a particularly harsh gust from the elements sent them scrambling for their packs. Soon, three patched tents had risen from the splintered floorboards, their occupants tucked inside, staring at the shadows produced by the dying fire as the waning light danced around the room.

Jean sighed, pulling his head back into the flap, listening to the ancient structure creak ominously above them.

“Jean?” The brunette turned, his scowl softening at the sight of his small lover. 

The blonde had his back to the taller teen, knelt towards the back of the tent, having been struck by brilliance, folding his own tent into a thick pad beneath their bedrolls, offering yet another layer between the pair and the outside world. After a bit of finegaling and spitting strands of gold out of his mouth, the sparse conditions looked almost comfortable. Task completed, the slender cadet sat up straight and turned towards the source of the disturbance, blue eyes widened in concern, hair mussed, hands folded in his lap, patiently awaiting an answer. Jean let his eyes linger a moment longer before replying, taking in his boyfriend in the moment. 

Their cloaks and jackets were too wet to be of any use and remained by the fire to dry as much as possible before morning, leaving the squad in their white button downs and uniform pants. Armin had already taken that a step further and wriggled out of the straps of his gear before entering the small space. In the soft glow of the fire, perched daintily on his knees, dressed in his white button down and plain uniform pants, sapphire gaze fixed, blonde hair tousled adorably, Armin could have been a vision from above. Beginning to fidget under the hazel stare, the petite cadet tucked a strand of errant hair behind his ear (doing nothing for the ruffled mess) and hesitantly spoke again.

“Jean- oh!” In a flurry of movement and a tangle of limbs, Jean had launched himself at the smaller boy, catching him gently around the waist and laying him down on their makeshift bed beneath his own lanky frame. Surprised but not at all alarmed, Armin allowed himself to be moved, giggling as Jean pressed a kiss to his nose. 

“Jean!” His voice was warm and light, smile shining through to brighten his face. “What was that for?” Now, white uniform in sharp contrast to the dark fabric beneath them, strands of sunshine spread like a halo, smile gracing gentle features, the blonde couldn’t be more beautiful if he had tried. Aphrodite would spit in jealousy had she seen Armin lying there, shirt rumpled, revealing a stretch of pale, smooth skin, firelight flickering over a form relaxed from a warm, easy love. “Jean? You’re being a bit-”

“Sorry!” The brunette hastily sat up a bit, flushing at being caught. “I was just- sorry.” He trailed off, looking away bashfully.

“Hey!” Armin interrupted, wriggling upright slightly to reach for his lover. “What’s the matter? I know when something is troubling you.” He brushed a hand, somehow still smooth after years of training and use. “Please, tell me what it is?” Never one to beat around the bush, Jean sighed and smiled, encircling the smaller in his arms and pulling him into his chest. Armin, ever amused, allowed himself to once more be directed, slipping into his favorite place as though he were made to fit. “Well?”

“So impatient,” Jean chided, pressing a kiss to the top of the head on his chest, smirking as Armin looked up at him in mock annoyance.

“I am not-”

“Just a joke ‘Min.” Through with his teasing, the perfectly schooled smile dissolved into a look Armin had never seen. Something serious and open, and somehow, vulnerable, all at once.

“The truth is, I was thinking about how beautiful you are,” Armin made a soft noise, similar to that of a startled cat, and blinked up into his lovers fond gaze, “And how this is how I want to remember you, remember us, forever. ‘Cause I love you ‘Min, you know? So much. I love you.”

Unable to bear anymore, Armin buried himself in his lover’s embrace. “...I love you too.”

Wrapped in one another, the two sat in silence, just existing for a moment of peace in their hell on earth. If nothing else, they could depend on one another, strong, steady, and supportive. Seconds passed, then minutes, before either spoke.

“...I wish we could stay like this forever.” Armin whispered.

“Me too.”

As though communication by thought rather than words, the two broke apart for a moment, Jean to remove the remainder of his gear, and Armin to unzip the rear of their tent slightly, so the two could see out the gritty panes of the window into the night beyond. Tasks finished, the two slipped under their combined bedclothes and moved together, Armin slipping back into his lovers arms, jostling their heads together slightly and drawing a small giggle from them both. 

“Happy Yule, Jean.” The blonde said softly. Jean sighed, allowing his hand to slip into the soft honeyed strands of his companion. 

“Happy Yule, Armin.” He paused, adding guiltily, “I meant to get you a gift. I’m sorry.”

“Jean,” Armin’s voice was gentle. “You don’t have to get me anything.”   
“Ar-” The small blonde turned to face the tall boy, once more running a hand along the troubled features, smiling as Jean turned into the touch, kissing his palm.

“Jean,” The blonde interrupted. “Do you love me?” 

The answer was immediate.

“More than anything.”

“Good.” He affectionately bunted his head into Jean’s shoulder, clasping their hands securely.

Jean allowed himself to smile. “Do you love me?”

“More than anything.” 

“Good.” He swept down and kissed at the gentle slope of his lovers ear. Armin giggled again, carefree and soft.

“You goof!” He laughed again, trying to stifle the sound. “You’ll wake the others!”

“Hey!” Jea playfully argued. “It is a gift after all, I’m just making sure you get all of it!” For a second, all was still, the two lovers staring at one another, happy, and a little winded.

In a single motion Armin shot up and pressed his lips onto his partner’s, catapulting both into a whirlwind of sheer passion. Jean’s arms came up instantly to support the smaller form, as Armin slipped his own around a broad torso. For a moment, everything else was swept away, leaving just two boys, completely in love, terrified of losing one another, and desperate to cherish every moment they had left.

\-------------

All too soon, the time came for them to break apart, breathlessly pausing to lean into one another, simply relishing in their closeness. Sliding back to their original position beneath the rumpled blankets, Jean, reached out to clasp Armin securely to his chest, the smaller eagerly cuddling closer, warm and safe with his lover wrapped around him.

Nothing more was said. Words were no longer needed.

Outside, the snow glistened icily under the full moon, indifferent to the warmth within.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's 6am. I have been up all night.  
> College is killing me.  
> I tried.  
> Comment please, they make me update faster
> 
> Indelibly Yours,  
> -Boxed In


	7. Love is more (Part 1)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Love is more than just a game for two."
> 
> In which there is a break, and a party.
> 
> Part 1 of 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I haven't updated in a while. I'm working on my Master's and it is rough, and I have no time.  
> I'm trying y'all, I promise.

_ Love is more than just a game for two _

“Aaaaand, we are  _ officially _ on leave!” Sasha announced, Connie emphasizing her words by banging two pots together. “You know what that means!”

The cabin was silent.

“Helloooo?” Connie continued to test the limits of the cookware. “Guys?” Not one member of the new scouts raised so much as an eyebrow, the pair withering slightly at the nonresponse. Finally, Eren sat up from where he had been hanging by his knees, continuing to flick nut shells into Jean’s unoccupied bunk.

“Oh hey, Sasha, what are you doing in here?”

“Oh fuck the lot of you.” The pots dropped with a clatter, Connie barely avoiding a crushed foot by throwing himself on the empty bed. 

“Ow!” 

And standing just as quickly, frantically brushing shell fragments from where they had embedded in his clothes and skin. “What the fuck Eren.”

“What are you doing here?” Annie parroted from the top bunk, eyes never leaving the spinning dagger in her hands.

“What are  _ you _ doing here?” Sasha snapped back, swinging herself up, nearly kneeing Eren in the face. “Isn’t this the boys’ cabin?”

“Yeah.” the blonde gestured behind her vaguely. “Mikasa’s here too.”

“Sup’ Mikasa?” Connie called, fending off another shell. Sasha groaned.

“Are you seriously telling me that none of you are excited about being on leave?” A nut bounced off her shoulder. “Seriously, Eren?”

“Nope, sarcastically.” The teen replied with a smirk, dropping back to dangle upside-down. “And for the record, that wasn’t me.”

“Sorry.” Bertolt called from across the room, clearly not sorry.

“Though, I am out,” Eren remarked, searching his pockets. “Bert, nut me!”

“Unbelievable.” Sasha muttered, side-stepping the flying seeds. “Un-believable.”

“Sasha, we’re on leave for three days. We’re lucky to catch up on sleep by then.” Reiner supplied helpfully from the floor, turning his page disinterestedly. “Just relax.”

The brunette girl stared hopelessly around the room, locking eyes with her partner in crime who could only shrug.

“You know what? Screw you guys.” Sasha marched out of the room with Connie in tow. “Jean was right, Eren is a chicken.”

Eren fell off the bed, head knocking audibly into the wooden floor.

“Excuse me? I think I might have gone temporarily deaf.”

“You did hit your head.” Annie snarked. Eren settled for flipping her off, scrambling to his feet.

“What did horse-face say about me?”

Sasha let a smile creep across her face, stopping abruptly in the doorway.

“Not much, just that you were too much of a coward to join us.”

“Well he’s a fucking liar.” Eren snarled. “I’ll kick his stupid teeth in, I swear. Where is he?”

“With Armin, where else?” Reiner interjected.

“But,” Connie smirked at his captive audience. “He will be participating in tonight’s activities…”

“What are you talking about? What activities?” Eren persisted. The terrible two cackled.Eren was theirs now. Hook, line, and sinker.

“Oh, look who’s curious now?”

“Damn right I’m curious!” Eren stumbled over to the pair, choosing to look down at Connie instead of level at Sasha. “What the hell are you up to?”

“Meet in the common-room after dark and you’ll see.” Connie laughed, shoving his co-conspirator back into the hall. 

The door slammed in Eren’s face before he could say another word.

\----

Eren turned to the rest of the teens.

“Well?”

Mikasa sighed, untangling her scarf from the bedsheets. “If Eren goes, I go too.” 

Annie sheathed her knife. “Guess I’m in.”

“What about you Bert?” Eren turned to face the other two boys. “Reiner?”

The tall boy sighed. “Rei-”

“If Armin’s there…” Bert smacked his friend. Eren grinned.

“It’s a plan.”

For a moment, it was quiet again, each of the teens resuming their previous activities.

“Hey,”

“What, Bert?”

“Has anyone seen Historia?”

The response was unanimous.

“Ymir.”

\-----

“Sasha?”

“Yes?”

“What  _ are _ we doing tonight?”

“Open that cabinet.”

Connie gaped at the bottles of liquor.

“Where did you get this?”

Sasha shrugged.

“It was a gift.”

“From who?”

“You mean ‘from whom’.”

“Shut up.”

Twin grins turned into giggle, the pair fistbumping.

“Oh, tonight is going to be  _ legendary. _ ”

\----

Jean turned from the chess board, concentration broken.

“What’s up with them?”

Armin shrugged, nudging a pawn.

“Checkmate.”

Jean turned back quickly enough to crack his neck.

“Ow! Fuck.” He stared at the candle-lit game, face betraying his bewilderment with eyes and mouth wide. “I have all your pieces but five! And, and you only have my pawns! How the hell did you win?”

The blonde shrugged, cheeks reddening. “You trapped yourself behind your own pieces.” His voice was soft, without a hint of superiority or condescension to darken the tone. “So, you sort of got in your own way.”

The brunette signed, holding out his hand to shake. Armin returned the gesture, color stealing over his face as his partner pressed his lips to his hand.

“Ah mon petit prince,” The words rolled naturally off his tongue. “You’re lucky you’re cute.”

Armin shook his head.

“Flatterer. Come on,” he reached for the board. “Let’s play again.”

_ To be continued... _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love them comments. Tell me what you think.
> 
> Again, I'm super busy but I will try to give updates (and a new story is in the works).
> 
> Indelibly Yours,  
> -Boxed In

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you think!


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